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Haiku de Gr​â​ce

by Klopfenpop

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1.
Matt: Everything is fucked up But you can just get fucked So everything that's fucked up can just go die die die Find someone to fuck Make sure you don't get fucked Because those fucks can fuck you up and then you'll cry cry cry Rook: When you grow up you earn a lot about living And while it's true that the universe is unforgiving Table your misgivings, let your wonderment blossom Cuz the truth is being a grown up is totally fucking awesome We play possum with the facts, but it's agreed That you can have whatever you want, satisfaction guaranteed And while you don't like it now you'll spend a lot of time thinking About girls or boys instead of toys and massive quantities of drinking Billy: Listen up kids, call me Mr. The Fridge I'm your substitute teacher and it is what it is We all grow up, can't be a kid forever Even Peter Pan said good bye to Never-never Land Damn, think I could borrow sixty bucks? I know a girl who let's me tink her if I bring her pixie dust (Ew!) Kiddies trust if you think you like Caprisun Wait until they sell you umbrella drinks with peach rum Klop: Go be a beach bum or hitchhike to Vegas And never take shit from anyone who thinks they're the greatest Cuz to a certain extent, everyone's an imposter We all let others drown to keep our heads above water Everything dies and shit won't grow back Things you love will make you cry, you should so know that But don't hold back. Check your sources, Know the facts. You can't change a god damned thing so, you know, relax Matt: Everything is fucked up But you can just get fucked So everything that's fucked up can just go die die die Find someone to fuck Make sure you don't get fucked Because those fucks can fuck you up and then you'll cry cry cry Klop: Yeah alright, everything sucks, but it's kinda okay Because you make your own luck at the end of the day But remember, everything that feels good has a price Still everything worth doing's worth doing at least twice And that means vice. Don't miss what the world has to offer Pay well for your drugs and match your liquor with water Figured I ought to give your something that's useful Cuz whatever people tell you almost none of it's truthful Billy: Life's fucked, you little bastards'll see They'll charge you out the ass for a master's degree After the fees and the books and major expenses You'll shoot porn in your dorm just to pay for your pencils "What're pencils?" Fuck you kids and your tablets Screen-fingering addicts developing habit So have at it, grow old, be an adult Where you can get drunk before you do what you're told Rook: Use your best judgement...oh fuck it, go crazy! Be a hedonist or selfish prick or totally lazy Guzzle soda, crunch candy, and fondle your junk, Learn about shit on the internet, or just fake the funk Because lying is easy and we do it on the daily To win friends and cash and fuck the cute chick with the ukulele Pick your nose, watch too much TV, play every video game Adulthood is the tits and childhood is fucking lame Matt: Everything is fucked up But you can just get fucked So everything that's fucked up can just go die die die Find someone to fuck Make sure you don't get fucked Because those fucks can fuck you up and then you'll cry cry cry Everything is fucked up But you can just get fucked So everything that's fucked up can just go die die die Find someone to fuck Make sure you don't get fucked Because those fucks can fuck you up and then you'll cry cry cry
2.
3.
Soul Custody 03:22
You know me, I could be your best friend Makin’ dreams come true from the eastside to the west end But perhaps an introduction’s in order, Some see me as sinister, but I’m a simple soul sorter. They paint me as the bad guy, guile incarnate Horned and mustachioed, styled in scarlet As you can see, I’m quite well-dressed and kempt, Clean-shaven and I write off the rest as contempt They got it out for me, but that’s neither here nor there They’re the ones who made this world neither clear nor fair. And evil? I wouldn’t go quite that far, I don’t claim to be faultless, but we are who we are. And all I’m here do is make your dreams a reality You wanna fly? Let me take care of gravity. Fame, power, sex? You want it then have it, see I’m here for you, to assist in your depravity. [hook] I'm about to offer you the greatest deal in the world Why just imagine: Rich, better looking More powerful, number one, so rich, more I'm about to offer you the greatest deal in the world Here's your chance. You have a choice! I believe that I had found the answer: Yes Now let me level with you, it’s a two-way street You get whatever grips you, but the loot ain’t free If I’ma give you the world, I best be seeing returns: The promise of your soul before this meeting adjourns One-time deal, so you can take or leave it Offer so real you couldn’t make believe it You got the rest of your life before the payment’s due …It’s like no money down ‘til you're through It’s always up to you, you could plot the devout route Or you can go through me and get your lot without doubt But, candy or rock whether or not you found out It might taste sweet but it’ll rot your mouth out The paperwork’s drawn up here on the desk So if you’re up for the deal, let’s endorse the check Now, while it might not be as diabolical as mine I’ma need your signature right here on this dotted line [hook] You made a big decision here today, my friend. The smart one, too, and that I commend. But why so worried, it’s not like you’re the first A lot of clients ended up accepting the curse That kid Nic from Genoa, used to play on the street Plucked a mandolin so his family could eat Just seven years old when he made the trade Best damned fiddler to this day to play. And Little Robert Dusty from Robinsonville He was always awful trusty and honest until That late night by old Will Dockery’s plantation When we bartered for that musical incantation And fair warning: after this visit’s conclusion You’ll convince yourself that I was just a vivid delusion And in time, my memory will fade to a rumor But I’ll be back to collect, later or sooner [hook]
4.
Duck & Cover 03:49
It is an awful responsibility which has come to us We thank god that it has come to us He looked at his hands And not to our enemies His hands were dirty And we pray that he may guide us to use it In his ways And for his purposes We have spent more than two billion dollars On the greatest scientific gamble in history And we have won It's too early yet to tell what effect the atomic bomb will have on Japanese morale And if we may have to destroy four or five cities before they actually believe we have such a bomb I made the run Let the bomb go That was my greatest thrill It was fun to watch This explosion is one of the most beautiful sights ever seen by man Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover In times like these Most men become highly suggestable They listen eagerly for any voice which sounds authoritative Let us build a bomb The United States of American should immediately begin construction of the H bomb I feel we must make the H bomb It's my personal opinion that we should manufacture the H bomb in quantity I wouldn't worry nearly as much about the atom bomb if it were to kill you right out What scares me is that awful gas the deforms you We have developed scientifically Much more than we are capable of handling Emotionally And intellectually All the world knows we Americans are construction not destructive Or course there are risks if we are not vigilant But we do not have to be hysterical Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover Duck and cover It is suggested that everyone remain indoors until further notice There is no danger Don't worry about yourselves You'll be okay We must be ready everyday All the time Well I guess there's nothing for us to worry about We're the one that have the bomb It's a bomb duck and cover 5 4 3 2 1
5.
Klop: I used to have a normal life, but it's a pitiful sign That now I can't have a thought and not commit it to rhyme I can't not rock a spot if I'm given a mic And if a cypher breaks out, yeah I'm spitting some rhymes I really did it this time, I done fucked up my life Cuz I can't make it through the week without rocking a mic I need a lyrics fix, so fuck appearances I made it here, it's just, I'm kinda wanting to write But I don't need that shit anymore Laying in the gutter strung out on some metaphors Man, that's the old me and I ready to call it quits But I keep falling off, I'll tell you what the problem is People hear me do it, tell me I should do it some more 'Til my fluids pouring to the floor, then cue the remorse These enablers are adding to my mountain of pain Cuz every time I rap they be shouting my name Messiah: You see I gave it up once, but it wasn't for me so keep it moving, push along, nothing to see I mean, sure relationships unravel and such Because I don't make hits and I travel too much And I'm scratching and I'm clawing and I'm paddling up And impossible river just like your average duck Yeah, you know, I quack when I suck But I'll never give up the sound of the magical stuff I mean, think about the way it hits your eardrum The way it satiates the place you hear from Think about that feel when the tears come And this world ain't so lonely and fearsome Um...where was I? YOLO, Just Do It, and bonsai Ahead of the game, not one of those numb guys I could quit whenever I want now Yo, check it out, look at this thumb drive... Tribe: I've been clean for about a year and a half now I no longer want the audience cheering and clap sounds I've quieted the beats I used to hear in the background And I'm happy. No really, I'm serious. Rap's out of my life Oh god, I live a lie when out in public And the only way that I survive is writing rhymes about the subject Anytime when I'm in private I just lust to clutch the microphone And be the me that no one sees when I'm alone inside my home I keep the doors locked when visitors come And I hold my breath as they test the doorknob and jiggle it some And then eventually they storm of thinking I'm scum And they're right, I'm a poor slob and this isn't fun ("Niles, come on") No I'm not done, don't talk! Just listen for once I've tried everything to ward off my addiction to drums One time I chewed a whole box of nicotine gum But it didn't change the way it rolls off the tip of my tongue And there's no stopping it when it's begun... Fiending for a microphone Addiction I cannot kick on my own, I need some help Blazing microphones a habit At least once during the course of a day, it's automatic I fiend for a microphone, like heroin At night the open mic be inviting me to rhyme Give me a stage and a mic and a mix I need a fix Even one who knows the dangers may become addicted before he realizes it
6.
Both: Look at me, I'm a taxicab driver Go down the street scope potential riders Hey girl, where you going? What's up dude? I'll take you there if you got that loot Yo you checking me, I'm just a taxicab driver I charge a fee, it's credits or saliva Yo bot, Just keep your grill off the leather We'll go through two time zones together Billy: Cash, hash, or gash, you won't ride pro bono Looking for a fare so I don't roll solo Mess with my money I'll be one cold robo I need that big tip in my hand, no homo Hit the strip, pick up the girls from the go-go They tip big but kid, this could go slow so I side gig delivering candygrams "Ho ho! Four for you, yo you go Glen Coco" Know what I mean girls? Hit it like fast forward Pick up a business bot, A Class boarder I speed to SeaTac air transporter Cheapskate pays exact to the last quarter So fuck him, I buck him to the curb Looking for the pedestrian to disturb Hey you, you need a ride? Hop in, word Cash over credits payment is preferred To the south end, the I-5 corridor Turn on some radio tunes I'm sorta bored It's that Supercommuter, 10th Gen I kinda wish these partybots were my best friends For a second, then I'm checking for the clients I'm programmed to go ham, no defiance Sometimes I wish I was a household appliance A stay-at-home-bot, I could dabble in science Alas, I gotta reboot my pipe dreams At least I'm no fridgebot slinging ice creams On my dash I've accumulated nice things I got a pair of fuzzy dice and some flight wings And the night brings brand new passengers To drunk to drive, be sure to fasten your seatbelt Need help? I'll be patient. Some bots can't handle their lubrication To the station, gotta refuel the taxi Damnit, that bot blew bolts in my backseat Both: Look at me, I'm a taxicab driver Go down the street scope potential riders Hey girl, where you going? What's up dude? I'll take you there if you got that loot Yo you checking me, I'm just a taxicab driver I charge a fee, it's credits or saliva Yo bot, Just keep your grill off the leather We'll go through two time zones together Klop: It's been a quiet night, ain't had a fare in a minute Got that compliant ride, and it's apparent I've been at this since the beginning When citizens admitted the distance from barren to prison With innocence impairing their vision Decisions inhibiting profiteering ambition Mandating efficiency, crippling paradise visions For all the oil barons and baronesses and mistresses This is just, the price of progress but I share their misgivings It's not like there was much care and precision given To such an industry despairing decision Just one fell swoop it took to tear this incision And no one cares to repair the glaring divisions But the impulse for progression has catapulted convention To a new renaissance of resulting inventions New upgrade each week assaulting the senses Whether motion detection or sonic pulsion ascension Some new combustionless engine, yeah I could do with that junk Head to Karl's, see what the newest pack runs Hooks me up with a set of propulsion blast drums Then I pull out the bay bumping some Ultraklystron got the purple Krylon applied on the stacks Turtle brand wax shine on the hack Pick up a couple cylons that pile on in back Forget these bygones, man my job is wack Now I need an energy renewal Dirty bots siphoned off thirty liters of fuel New energy source, let's get this beater retooled If I wanna do work then I need these Joules Be cool, it's just part of the gig Keeping up with the gadgets to install in the rig Gotta go all in before the wallet gets thick But I'ma make it some day and be balling with this Both: I'm never gonna make it bot I hate it out here I'll swallow my fear then I'll step up and I'll take it someday I'll step up and I'll take it someday Someday
7.
Beefy: Welcome to the wild Northwest Kill a sasquatch and a cougar in the mountains make a bulletproof vest And saying, "Howdy, how you doing?" Yeah you see me around On every single wanted poster plastered all over town Misunderstandings they can happen with the best of intentions Don't wanna rob you, I need a couple bucks for my best friends They got expensive habits⁠—Don't you look at my face! If any of you move a muscle, I'll blow up this whole bank! I hit the trail and the nights were cold, days were longer by the second Right when I knew where I was going, they went and changed directions Swear my heat can take a half a dozen with me Cause if I feel I've been beaten I don't want nobody else to see me I'm a monolith, a scourge on the scene Committing acts of violence the microphone's never seen And likely never will again. The rough and rowdy gentleman A king out in this desert while you city slickers play pretend They walked with the sun Through the lawless frontier And slept with the moon Both honest men and criminals The first man they look for And the last they want to meet They walked with the sun Through the lawless frontier And slept with the moon Both honest men and criminals Their footprints covered the land I'm that man Klop: Haven't seen the city in a few long months I like it gritty, but it's pretty hard to move on once You got a family to feed and a brand to achieve It's a sham, we do the manly duty, can we succeed? Sometimes at night I catch a glimpse on the horizon behind me An emerald reflection in the sky trying to find me A lot of yellow bricks between this town and home A lot of miles missed, since I found shalom I used to roam those roads, nowadays don't go so close Kicking it in solo mode, thinking how I won't go pro Only you don't know though, lingering ghosts don't last And it's hard to turn around when headwinds blow so fast Bartenders, they be my closest confidants I think they're intrigued by my corrosive nonchalance The verbosest entourage, it's a solo affair But sometimes I get to thinking they don't know that I'm there They walked with the sun Through the lawless frontier And slept with the moon Both honest men and criminals The first man they look for And the last they want to meet They walked with the sun Through the lawless frontier And slept with the moon Both honest men and criminals Their footprints covered the land I'm that man Rook: Silver bullets in the chamber, unsubtle mindchanger Danger is a wayward stranger Nerdlinger, gunslinger, two fingers and a thumb cocked Wielding words like weapons, bars that bang away like buckshot Roughshod, saddle straddling the mustang Pistoleer of poetry I'm pretty when I cuss, dang No thang, just draw, point, fire Writing symphonies in blood of infamy, gun for hire Put MCs in the Boot Hill dirt to make my name That's the game at high noon, but now there's gunmetal in my mane Silverback killer riding high on that steel horse Tip too many and I'm ready, see you and your soul divorced Father Time adding weight to my sentence Try to exorcise the devil in delivery, but no repentance Desperado bravado can't cut the cost incurred Epistolero; live by the word, die by the word They walked with the sun Through the lawless frontier And slept with the moon Both honest men and criminals The first man they look for And the last they want to meet They walked with the sun Through the lawless frontier And slept with the moon Both honest men and criminals Their footprints covered the land I'm that man
8.
Don't try to call me, don't leave a message It's three in the morning and you're drunk dialing questions Banging on the ear drums, guess who's listening to you get through another jabber-jaw session I hit the pillow kinda high feeling mellow Worked all day body obviously Jell-o, but Hello, can't even roll into the REM state Cell phone resonate, you need a friend to ventilate Fuck, can't it wait? I just got comfortable Just got the pillows how I like it and it's wonderful I lied, there's only one obstacle To make it all justified in my eyes accountable, so... You call me in the daytime I'll laugh and nod and smile and shake my head But don't call me at three in the morning Unless you're dealing with the living dead, I said Don't call unless it's zombies Don't wake me up unless it's finally true You wanna talk about your boyfriend and his friends, that's cool If they're not scratching at your door, then save it for the afternoon I wanna hear you say you need me around I wanna hear the chainsaws in the background I wanna hear you saying that the dead are alive, You need me to survive, I'll come along for the ride Really, it better be a full on invasion, Damn cutes not a valid open invitation to Anytime minutes to moan, bitch, and cuss I need dead tissue and guts, infected cuts It's not much, but I do have my reasons Been pretty damn busy all evening I'm not talking feelings, I'm gonna lay low Unless skin's peeling off like it's Play-Doh... You call me in the daytime I'll laugh and nod and smile and shake my head But don't call me at three in the morning Unless you're dealing with the living dead, I said Don't call unless it's zombies Don't wake me up unless it's finally true You wanna talk about your girlfriend and her friends, that's cool If they're not scratching at your door, then save it for the afternoon Don't call late unless a blatant case of brain rot Makes your dad grab your mom and bite until her veins pop And don't call at a quarter to four unless Tie dye gore stains are dripping down your tanktop Over lunch, we can talk about the issues, Who you hate date and table waiting in your new shoes Rent due, plus science and the news, no Voodoo, swine flu, radiated toxic goop, Instead I'm up and it's the same old nonsense Same old content, same old problems Think twice if you're dialing my phone If you can't see a zombie, then leave me the fuck alone You call me in the daytime I'll laugh and nod and smile and shake my head But don't call me at three in the morning Unless you're dealing with the living dead, I said Don't call unless it's zombies Don't wake me up unless it's finally true You wanna talk about your boyfriend and girlfriends, that's cool If they're not scratching at your door, then save it for the afternoon
9.
Lex: I know I'm trapped right here for now So I roll one up and lose myself Going lightspeed lightyears away But the running really ain't much help Sparking my third today Hard to fight the urge today To just say Fuck it And I don't know Why's the night so long No I don't know Why do I feel so alone I don't know Will they miss me when I'm gone Or am I wrong and there's nothing? I just wanna smoke and vibe to the music I just wanna smoke and ride to the future I just wanna smoke and fly away from here All this windy funk and this crashing rain I can't stay here I just wanna smoke and vibe to the music I just wanna smoke and ride to the future I just wanna smoke and fly away from here All this windy funk and this crashing rain I can't stay here no more I know I'm in low gear for now But the battle's always been up hill And all these claustrophobic days Have always been a test of will Lost count of the herb today Smoked so much that I couldn't say I just blazed Fuck it, man fuck it And I don't know Why's the night so long No I don't know Why do I feel so alone I don't know Will they miss me when I'm gone Or am I wrong and there's nothing? I just wanna smoke and vibe to the music I just wanna smoke and ride to the future I just wanna smoke and fly away from here All this windy funk and this crashing rain I can't stay here I just wanna smoke and vibe to the music I just wanna smoke and ride to the future I just wanna smoke and fly away from here All this windy funk and this crashing rain I can't stay here no more Klop: I'm part homebody and part wayfarer They say prayers to allay their misplaced terror I stay where the shame snare remains. There're many paths the same error What I want, who I am, are both adrift and aground Cuz the thoughts that I have live amid crippling doubt And as squad turns to fam, it's a dwindling crowd Cuz I stopped giving damns about who thinks that I'm down. Consider it now, the march of time is relentless And there's nothing them or I can try to prevent this We can squint at sky or get high, it's all senseless Just an attempt get less restless. It's endless There's no escape from this place we abide Some have made it off this rock, come back down, and survived And terminal insignificance is all they describe Cuz no one makes it out alive Lex: I just wanna smoke and vibe to the music I just wanna smoke and ride to the future I just wanna smoke and fly away from here All this windy funk and this crashing rain I can't stay here I just wanna smoke and vibe to the music I just wanna smoke and ride to the future I just wanna smoke and fly away from here All this windy funk and this crashing rain I can't stay here no more
10.
Outro 03:53

credits

released January 30, 2020

Haiku de Grâce mixed and mastered by Klopfenpop at Digital Organic Recordings.

Grown Up To No Good (feat. Matt Mahaffey, MC-3PO, Billy The Fridge, & Packy Lundholm):
verse 1, 6 by MC-3PO
verse 2, 5 by Billy The Fridge
verse 3, 4 by Klopfenpop
hook vocals by Matt Mahaffey
guitars and bass by Packy Lundholm
scratching, production, and mixing by Klopfenpop
additional production by Matt Mahaffey

Klopfenpop and Billy The Fridge's vocals recorded at Digital Organic Recordings. Engineered by Klopfenpop.
MC-3PO's vocals recorded at Noir Grime Studios. Engineered by Bill Beats.
Matt Mahaffey's vocals recorded at Fresh Imperial. Engineered by Matt Mahaffey.
Packy Lundholm's guitars and bass recorded at TightEye Studios. Engineered by Packy Lundholm.


Candy Man Interlude:
scratching and production by Bill Beats


Soul Custody:
written by Klopfenpop
beat by Bill Beats
vocal samples, additional production, and mixing by Klopfenpop

Klopfenpop’s vocals recorded at Noir Grime Studios. Engineered by Bill Beats.


Duck & Cover:
vocal samples, production, mixing by Klopfenpop
scratches by Dopey Ziegler

Dopey Ziegler's scratching recorded at The Forest Moon of Endor. Engineered by Dopey Ziegler.


Friends of Ill feat. Shane Hall & Tribe One:
verse 1 by Klopfenpop
verse 2 by Shane Hall
verse 3 by Tribe One
written by Klopfenpop, Shane Hall, and Tribe One
production by Klopfenpop and Bill Beats
original beat concept by Bill Beats
scratching by Dopey Ziegler
bass by Packy Lundholm
sound design, additional voices, additional writing, and mixing by Klopfenpop

Klopfenpop’s vocals recorded at Noir Grime Studios. Engineered by Bill Beats.
Shane Hall's vocals recorded at Ticklebomb Studio. Engineered by Shane Hall.
Tribe One's vocals recorded at the Dirty South Swamp. Engineered by Tribe One
Dopey Ziegler's scratching recorded at The Forest Moon of Endor. Engineered by Dopey Ziegler.
Packy Lundholm's bass recorded at TightEye Studios. Engineered by Packy Lundholm.
Additional skit dialogue recorded at Digital Organic Recordings. Engineered by Klopfenpop.


Fuzzy Dice feat. Billy The Fridge:
verse 1 by Billy The Fridge
verse 2 by Klopfenpop
written by Optimus Rhyme, Billy The Fridge, and Klopfenpop
production and mixing by Klopfenpop

Klopfenpop and Billy The Fridge's vocals recorded at Digital Organic Recordings. Engineered by Klopfenpop.


The Hell Outta Dodge feat. Beefy & Rook The Rhymer:
verse 1 by Beefy
verse 2 by Klopfenpop
verse 3 by Rook The Rhymer
written by Klopfenpop, Beefy, and MC-3PO
scratching by Bill Beats
vocal samples, additional scratching, production and mixing by Klopfenpop

Klopfenpop and Rook The Rhymer’s vocals recorded at Noir Grime Studios. Engineered by Bill Beats.
Beefy's vocals recorded at Supersoda Studio. Engineered by Beefy.


Don’t Call Me:
written by Navi
production and instrumental mixing by 2 Mello
vocal production and mixing by Klopfenpop

Klopfenpop’s vocals recorded at Noir Grime Studios. Engineered by Bill Beats.


Windy Funk feat. Lex Lingo:
melodic vocals by Lex Lingo
rap vocals by Klopfenpop
written by Lex Lingo and Klopfenpop
bass, guitar, synth, tambourine, production, and mixing by Klopfenpop

Lex Lingo's vocals engineered by Lex Lingo.
Klopfenpop’s vocals and instrumentation recorded at Digital Organic Recordings. Engineered by Klopfenpop.

Outro:
upright bass, production and mixing by Klopfenpop

Upright bass recorded at Noir Grime Studios. Tape Operation and engineering by Bill Beats

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Klopfenpop Seattle

Klopfenpop is a genre-agnostic composer, writer, multi-instrumentalist, and producer from the Pacific Northwest.

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